26 March 2009

Can Can 2

The saga of Mr Obama's can continues. More worms keep tumbling out.

Addressing a congregation of persons who get outsourced business from US of A, he said, "The more you can, the less we can."
Then, beaming with pride he said, "If you can, so we can" and continued with some mischief in his voice, "Sow, you can, reap, we can."
Contemplating the market conditions, someone in the audience murmured, "Hope, we can. Hope, we can".
Obama's sharp ears picked that up and he said magnanimously, "Hope, you can. That you can".

25 March 2009

Can Can

Mr Obama opened up a can of worms.
He said, "yes, we can."
Now, the Tatas, during their Nano launch, said, "now, you can."
With the bailout package not making a dent, I can anticipate, "soon, we can".
If this grimm fairy tale continues we may soon hear, "When, we can, then, we can"

(The second 'm' in 'grim' above, has been auto added by google text editor)

19 March 2009

A lesson in Self Respect

On the day of Holi, I got a lesson in Self Respect.
Here in South India, Holi is not celebrated with the same gusto and vivacity as in North India. But there are revellers that you would find in the streets once in a while. As some of you must have endured, a whole lot of mischief passes off as revelry during Holi.
An old wrinkled hawker was resting under the shade in the street outside my house. His load of bananas was lying by his side as he was catching forty winks. My mother was at the gate watching the world go by in the street in front. A few good men came along the street swaggering and awash in their Holi 'spirit'. In an action that defined their spirit of Holi, they snatched at a bunch of bannanas lying at the old man's head. They made away with a few. My mother who was watching the scene with some trepidation let out a cry.
Before the old man could react, the revelers had disappeared. One could excuse the reactions of the old man, debilitated as he was from the heat and the load that he had been carrying on his head. Hearing my mother's cry I came down running. She let out the whole story between excited gasps. I felt pity on the old man and fetched out fifteen Rupees and offered the old man.
The old man looked straight in my eyes and said, "Fifteen Rupees? That would be three quarters a kilo." Pointing at the load in the wicker basket, he continued, "From which bunch would you like your bananas?"
It would be a while before I caught up this old man's self respect.

17 March 2009

Angel Resource Management in Heaven

I was musing on how God must be managing His HR or whatever it is called up there; probably called AR (Angel Resource) Management.

Must be truly a challenging task.

Say, He needs to motivate people(people?) for retention in heaven. He doesnt seem to have any tools for that. How would you motivate angels who already have whatever there is to have? I mean aren't they in a blissful state of 'No-wants'?

And again, suppose He is looking to hire new talent. How would He advertise? I mean, He cant very well say:
To go to heaven, do good and die fast.

Still again, suppose He wants to cut down on the attrition rate. Trust me, there will always be angels who would want out; too much of a good thing, they would say. I am sure He will be loathe to say, "Stick on in Heaven and I will give you what they give in Hell".

02 March 2009

Rain Dance

For centuries now I am the rain man.
I did my prayers, propitiated the gods
And did the rain dance.
Called in the clouds,
Over parched lands and thirsty sands.
But now they say I have lost my competency based identity
They have another trick now
The clouds go to the seed.
And then it rains and it pours.
In fact it brews a raging storm.
I need unlearning, they say.
They are telling me not to fear this storm.
But to learn to dance in the rain.
And to unlearn my prayers and my rain dance.

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